The Brilliance in Failure

Being honest about who I was, and what my demons were, allowed people to relate to me personally because I wrestled with the same issues and challenges as everyone else. It is somewhat ironic that I spent the first part of my career trying to cover up my insecurities and imperfections, only to discover later in my career that being openly imperfect actually made people feel better about me as a person, and more trusting of me as a leader. Over time, I have discovered that the ability of leaders to see themselves as they really are, as others see them—to honestly assess their strengths, their weaknesses, and their demons—is game changing. Self-awareness unlocks everything. It allows them to build teams that mitigate their weaknesses; to recognize situations that might trigger old feelings and insecurities; and to take a deep breath before responding in the moment. Self-awareness enables leaders to open up the strategic discussion or dialogue with the leadership teams; to explore a broader range of options; and to be open and honest with their teams and colleagues in a way that builds genuine trust and transparency. Self-awareness can fundamentally change the impact a leader can have on an organization. Unlocking this potential is what I focus on in development discussions with leaders today. I find that the right coaching and friendly feedback can make a significant impact if delivered well. I have to wonder about senior executives who show no empathy for young leaders still struggling with their demons, as if they themselves had no development challenges and needs as young leaders. I have observed senior leaders criticizing talented young executives still learning to manage and mitigate their demons. Those leaders can be quick to dismiss the younger executives’ skills, but they are missing the real opportunity when they act this way. The breakthrough opportunity is to find a way to wrap our arms around those leaders and provide them with the coaching and mentorship they need to overcome their personal issues and challenges. The objective should not be to judge them, but rather to build a better team and a deeper talent bench over time. Accomplishing that goal is not just about being tough and demanding in the performance dialogue. It is also about helping young leaders confront their demons and recognize their self-defeating behaviors, so that they can reach their full potential. Sometimes there are exceptionally talented leaders buried behind a façade of demons they have yet to wrestle to the ground. I try my best to look for and unlock that possibility.