Skinny Girl Chronicles
The Good, the Bad, and the Healing
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My mother and I had a complicated relationship. I loved her and felt to some degree, she loved me, but she wasn't overly enthusiastic about having eight children and it showed. She once revealed that if she had the means to have averted doing so, she would have. I took that to heart and our relationship has never been what I thought it should be. How was a young teenage girl who longed for her mother’s affection supposed to comprehend that? It hurt my heart that she would say such a thing. I love all of my siblings and I could not understand how she could not. Yes, it could have been overlooked or dismissed on my part, but my sensitivity did not allow for that. I believe by my not being able to do so, was the catalyst of future relationships with women. Now, I don’t dislike women because of that revelation, but have had complicated relationships and prefer quality over quantity, due to the chaos that potentially ensues during them. I find like-minded women to be my greatest allies and the others as tools for distinction. Mother created this fear in me that has haunted my entire being throughout my life. Out of fear, some people try to control the things they don’t understand how to deal with. Fear is a complicated emotion, which at times, has caused me to be someone other than my true self. I was taught early on to fear God and be respectful, especially to my parents, but had a hard time in doing so, because I am not a pretentious person and I would call things as I saw them. She had a remedy for that and my forward thinking would always end with my being punished for the words that would come so effortlessly come out of my mouth, as her way of controlling me and the things I would say. Words are powerful, but they were not used as a way of reinforcement to correcting the things I would say or do, that I had no idea was wrong. How was I supposed to know as a child, what I was saying was impolite and should only remain as thoughts in my mind? There wasn’t a lot of talking to us in my family, rather a lot of telling. The time was very different during the seventies and eighties. My own parents were trying to figure out where they belonged in this world and raising eight kids was no easy feat. Beatings by our mother, as it was called back then, are what my siblings and I had to endure as a form of punishment and nothing was spared by her in doing so. Our father was more level headed and never beat us. His no nonsense demeanor was all it took to correct us. Daddy would call my name sternly, “Anita Sharron” followed by whatever else he was going to say as his way of letting me know, that I needed to straighten up and fly right, as his way of discipline. This is how we were molded and it has taken quite a bit of unlearning on my part to become a better person, parent and significant other. The fear that sometimes controlled my entire being had to be shelved in order for me to actually live my life and not just exist through it, as I think they did.
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About the Book
Despite adversity, living a wonderful life is the ultimate goal and can be achieved by anyone determined to do so. You can be stagnant or move forward to greatness. In Skinny Girl Chronicles, author Sherry Hopper-Wall shares some of her major life events. Th ese include the highs and lows and the fear she developed at an early age, a fear that almost deterred her from creating a better life than her early years in Virginia. Her story reveals personal feelings and details about her coming of age as a young, black girl in a small, southern town; a strained mother-daughter relationship; a failed first marriage; and a renewed faith in love. She also highlights the fact she’s a highly sensitive person and how being so has played a major role in how she perceives the world around her, as well as how she responds to it. An intrinsically happy person, Hopper-Wall demonstrates resiliency and determination in moving forward from any encounter that doesn’t bring about positivity. When she became ill with Grave’s Disease, unlearning unhealthy habits became her primary focus to return to the full happiness she once knew. Skinny Girl Chronicles shares not only the good, but also the trials and uncertainties, which Hopper-Wall conquered with determination.
About the Author
Sherry Hopper-Wall is a thirty-one-year veteran educator who has traveled the world with her husband. She earned a bachelor’s degree in intermediate education from Winston Salem State University and a Master of Education in curriculum and instruction from Old Dominion University. An Army/Army Reserve veteran who served from 1987–1991, she also mentors young women. Hopper-Wall is currently managing Grave’s Disease.