Being Neurotic: A Children's Book for Adults
by
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If you are not sure if you qualify for our wonderful club, here is a little quiz for you to take to determine how neurotic you might be:
You know you are neurotic when:
1. You apologize to the chairs that you bump into. (Silly question; it doesn’t even count in scoring – someone highly neurotic begged me to include it.)
2. You stress so much when filling out standardized forms that you have to take a Xanax to compose yourself.
3. You don’t walk the dog in the cold for fear that she will develop pneumonia and then give it to you.
4. You spend hours reading golf magazines and selecting the perfect putter only to freeze up on the course and hit your ball into a water hazard.
5. You plan a wonderful vacation to Australia then freak out because your luggage may exceed the size or weight limits.
6. You switch between two pairs of glasses because you can’t manage the challenge of bifocals.
7. You are the only one wearing slip-on shoes in the airport security line.
8. You have created five different Facebook accounts and then stress out when trying to figure out who is who among your multiple screen identities.
9. When traveling you get stopped by airport security for having too many bottles of pills in your bag.
10. You cannot listen to anyone’s symptoms without immediately identifying with them.
11. If you listed your fears and worries, you would run out of paper.
12. Your fear of dying is much greater than your fear of death … and the later is pretty big.
13. Having to use a public restroom requires a series of moves that might qualify you as a gymnast for the Olympics.
14. If you grew up hearing about superstitions (usually from mother), it is impossible not to follow any ritual necessary to ward off evil spirits.
15. If you see a picture on the wall that is slightly crooked, you feel compelled to fix it. By the way, 94% of the population has some unwanted, intrusive thoughts. So a little obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is no big deal!
16. If a loved one is in the bathroom for more than three minutes, you yell out “Are you all right?”
If you answered “yes” to at least five questions, you are slightly neurotic and will enjoy the book. ( Remember question #1 doesn’t count for scoring ) If you answered “yes” to eight to twelve questions, you are definitely neurotic and will relate well to our book. If you answered “no” to all questions, you definitely need the book because you are a neurotic who is in denial! How do I know that you are neurotic? I know you are neurotic because you bought the book in the first place.
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About the Book
Do you stress so much when filling out standardized forms that you have to take a Xanax to compose yourself? If you listed your fears and worries, would you run out of paper? If a loved one is in the bathroom too long, do you yell out “Are you all right”? If you answer “yes” to these questions and many more listed in the book, you may be eligible to join the neurotic club with author Dr. Terry Bordan.
In Being Neurotic: A Children’s Book for Adults, take a journey through life as seen from the eyes of the typical “neurotic.” Lighthearted and downright truthful, it discusses issues, feelings, and fears that are more commonplace for those who wear the mantle of the neurotic one.
Dr. Bordan not only recognizes what goes into making someone neurotic but helps to celebrate those qualities. It transforms symptoms that many view as negative into those that can be quite charming and disarming. Written by a real neurotic, it shares that being “normal” is not to enjoy the idiosyncrasies that make life fun and somewhat challenging.
About the Author
Dr. Terry Bordan is a Licensed Professional Counselor and former Professor and Chair of the Graduate Department of Counseling and Development, Long Island University. She is the former Director of Counseling at the US Merchant Marine Academy, past editor of The Journal for the Professional Counselor, has taught in the Tactical Officers’ Education Program at the US Military Academy at West Point, and is the former host of the radio show, “Dr. Terry Bordan and Co.”