If DEI Could Talk

Excerpt from Chapter 1: A Personal Beginning Growing up in a small, predominantly white town, I learned early that race, identity, and the way society perceives you can shape everything. I was one of only two Black families on our cul-de-sac, and while the exclusion wasn’t always blatant, it was unmistakable. As a child, I couldn’t name it, but I could feel the difference. It was in the way the local store clerk would greet me with a smile when I was with my White friends but barely acknowledge my presence when I was alone or with another Black friend. It was in the unspoken rules of who was allowed to play and who wasn’t—an invisible line drawn based on race, even though we were all just kids. There’s one memory that stands out more than the rest. I was at the store with a group of White friends one afternoon. We were picking out snacks, laughing, and chatting, completely unaware of any difference between us. But the moment my Black friend joined us, the tone shifted. The store manager appeared, his eyes lingering on us for far too long before he approached. He asked us to leave. His words were polite but laced with a clear message: we were only allowed to purchase certain items together. The look in his eyes made it clear that my presence, and the presence of my friend, disrupted something—something that I didn’t fully understand at the time but felt deeply. This experience was one of many in my early life, and it planted the seed of curiosity about race, identity, and privilege. It wasn’t just a personal slight; it was a window into the larger systems of exclusion that exist in society. In my young mind, this was a mystery I needed to solve. Why were my friends treated differently because of their race? What made one person invisible while another was given access to the full spectrum of possibilities? These questions, which were once buried beneath the surface of my childhood, would go on to shape my personal and professional life in ways I never could have predicted. I eventually came to realize that the exclusion I felt wasn’t just about me—it was about how society is structured to favor certain groups while sidelining others. But these realizations didn’t come overnight. They came through years of introspection, learning, and challenging the deeply embedded norms that I had once accepted as natural. As I grew older, I began to see these same dynamics play out in larger and more institutional ways. The patterns of exclusion I experienced in my small town were mirrored in workplaces, schools, and organizations across the country. Diversity, equity, and inclusion were not just theoretical concepts—they were real, lived experiences. And for too many people, these experiences were defined by exclusion, bias, and the feeling of being “othered.” Fast forward to my early career as a professional in the corporate world. The knowledge I had gained through personal experience was put to the test. I found myself in environments where I was often the only person of color in the room, where my ideas were dismissed, or my contributions overlooked. I navigated spaces where I was expected to prove my worth constantly, and where my leadership style and presence were scrutinized under a much harsher microscope than my colleagues. But even in those moments of challenge, I knew I had the tools to navigate these spaces. My experiences had taught me how to adapt, how to fight for space at the table, and how to show up as my authentic self, even when it was uncomfortable. Yet, I couldn’t help but wonder: Why did it have to be this way? Why was the burden of fitting into predominantly white spaces always on people of color, while those around me were free to navigate the workplace without having to constantly confront their own identity? It was in these moments of frustration that I realized something pivotal: diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) work is not just about ticking boxes or implementing a series of policies—it’s about fundamentally changing the way we approach leadership, organizations, and societal systems. The work of DEI is not just about improving outcomes for marginalized groups; it’s about reshaping our world so that everyone, regardless of their background, has an equal opportunity to thrive. Over time, my personal experiences—combined with my professional expertise—led me to pursue a career in DEI leadership. I became a consultant, trainer, and coach, working with organizations to develop more inclusive workplaces. It wasn’t easy, but it was necessary. The world of work needed change, and DEI professionals like myself were at the forefront of making that change possible. In this book, I’m not just sharing the lessons I’ve learned through years of professional experience; I’m sharing the truths that I’ve uncovered along the way. If DEI could talk, it would tell us about the pain of being excluded, about the struggle for recognition, and about the fear that change might never come. But it would also tell us about the potential for transformation—the possibility of creating organizations and cultures where every individual, regardless of their background, is seen, heard, and valued. As we delve into these pages, you’ll hear stories from my own life—stories of struggle, success, and self-discovery—as well as insights and lessons learned from years of working with leaders and organizations striving to create more inclusive environments. Together, we’ll explore what it truly means to embrace diversity, equity, and inclusion in the workplace, and how you can be part of the solution. This book is more than just a collection of ideas—it’s a call to action. If DEI could talk, it would remind us that while the journey has been long, there is still much work to be done. And it would challenge us to do the hard work of creating real, lasting change—one conversation, one organization, and one leader at a time.