The Woman with the Portfolio

CHAPTER SIX: CONFRONTING LIFE Ramath armed herself with determination to confront the fortresses of life, one after the other. She resolved to cling, climb, and lay siege to each one that stood in her way. She would move forward with her eyes open to the dangers that might strike, ready to dodge or counter them. Boldly facing death is the best alliance with life. The death of fear is the foundation of triumphant courage. Thus, nourished by Fatima’s energizing prophecies, Ramath seemed to have claimed her own prophetic independence, imprinting in her heart a fiery, unshakeable faith in her own self. She fervently believed she was no ordinary being, and she was determined to prove it to the world. She prophesied over her life in the names of gods, ancestral spirits, guardian angels, and a host of disembodied entities. Yet, she regarded the One God with suspicion, attributing to Him a dispassionate detachment, vain impartiality, and fatal slowness. Yet, she held firmly to the conviction that she would achieve her goals. She envisioned herself elevated to the highest summits, where nothing and no one could obstruct her. A swarm of ideas buzzed in her mind, supporting each other and building gigantic pyramids that pierced the heavens. Ramath imagined tilting the world slightly left or right at her whim, commanding people of all ranks, even powers and dominions. She saw herself possessing immense wealth that even her wildest extravagances could not deplete in a lifetime. She considered these things real, as though they had already occurred in the ether, merely waiting to manifest before human eyes. Certainly, obstacles would arise on her path; she would dismantle them all, one after the other, down to their very foundations, pulverizing them without hesitation. Enemies might rush at her from all four corners of the world; she would hold her ground on multiple battlefronts. * Ramath completed her higher education with a degree in environmental management from the geography program of the College of Arts, Letters, and Humanities. Most of her peers anxiously awaited career opportunities that were, at best, uncertain. Years had passed since the state abandoned the systematic recruitment of university graduates, while the private sector's disarray offered little hope for the many graduates of the National University. Yet Ramath faced a different reality, with several promising opportunities at her disposal. On the one hand, the dean of her faculty personally offered her a postgraduate scholarship abroad – a rare and lucrative opportunity granted sparingly by international cooperation. On the other hand, the influential director general of the environmental impact assessment bureau, affiliated with the Ministry of Planning and Economic Intelligence, where she had completed a short internship, offered her a position as his office assistant. Furthermore, the deputy cabinet director of the same ministry had reportedly created a role of coordinator for international organizations involved in climate change projects, a position specifically intended for her. All these high-ranking officials had interacted with Ramath at various points and retained fond memories of her: a vibrant, graceful presence, imbued with charm and sweetness. While not dependent on her, they found it pleasing to see her occasionally, rather than do without her altogether. Each remained in Ramath's portfolio, managed discreetly without the others’ knowledge. Indeed, between the end of her secondary education and her university graduation, Ramath abandoned the linear queue approach to relationships in favor of a portfolio management style for her partners. This strategy allowed her to control their flow, reduce turnover, and somewhat protect her reputation as a woman. At this time, she had around half a dozen stable partners, managed concurrently with remarkable finesse. This transformation was inevitable, as she transitioned from anonymity in a provincial town to gaining prominence in the university world, which opened doors to the national elite. Furthermore, the settings of her clandestine activities had significantly improved, as had the caliber of her partners. Yet Ramath kept meticulous track of them: thirty-three in total! Ramath was 24 years old. The key lay in her method of managing this intimate portfolio. First, she radiated universal kindness and affability, fostering a wide network of relationships. This created confusion about the roles of those around her, making it difficult to pin down the members of her inner circle. Among her suitors, she deployed a masterful art of compartmentalization – not by erecting physical barriers but through subtle means. To the contrary, she would host her suitors together, introduce them to one another, encourage camaraderie, and cultivate an atmosphere of familiarity and harmony within the group. They might cross paths, know each other even, but never grasp their individual roles in her life. Ramath constructed delicate veils between them – convenient doubts, false certainties, or sheer denial. Thus, each man played along in his own way: the pragmatists, out of realism; the jealous, out of fear; and the cynics, out of cunning. Some even found personal benefit in her system, enjoying access to her unique essence without being tethered by overt ties. These men willingly accepted their place in the arrangement, satisfied with the occasional taste of her charms in an atmosphere of peaceful coexistence and healthy rivalry.